Dealing with Backstabbers: Five Common Types of Backstabbers in the Office and Corresponding Strategies

Dealing with petty people

In the workplace, about 80% of people are serious, another 15% are of questionable integrity, but there are still 5% who are completely despicable. If you are not careful, they will try to harm you.

How bad are these guys? Well, you wouldn't want any of them accompanying your wife to the meeting in Rio.

Men's Health magazine has identified various types of office bullies. This article reports on five of the most common types, hoping to provide effective techniques to expose them.

Deceiving superiors and concealing the truth:

Such people are adept at appropriating the achievements of their subordinates. For example, they might use correction fluid to cover up the poor fellow's name in a long report written by a subordinate, then add their own name and submit it to their superior for review.

In a cutthroat company, stealing the effort of others is a common phenomenon, and from a certain perspective, you should feel proud when your boss gets promoted because of your excellent work. However, the actions of a deceitful person are different. They will absolutely steal your talent without ever giving anything in return. They will tell their boss that it's their work, not someone else's. For example, this kind of person will shamelessly claim that they came up with a new way to market a new toothpaste product or run a promotional campaign. So, when you've repeatedly lost out on the credit you deserve, you need to start finding ways to protect yourself.

Solution:

First, keep detailed records of all your work, even if only in your personal notebook. This way, you can readily mention your contributions if anyone asks. Second, you must learn to share your hard work with others. For example, at the company Christmas dinner, consider subtly approaching the big boss and saying something like, "Were you satisfied with the enthusiastic atmosphere at tonight's dinner? By the way, has my deceitful boss already sent you my new suggestion about dog grooming secrets?"

Of course, sometimes more direct action is necessary. When you meet someone in an elevator who says, "That guy has a lot of ideas; have you heard about his latest inspiration for dog grooming?" don't just stand there with your mouth agape. Instead, you should walk into that charlatan's office and find out the truth.

Even worse, when honors come with a series of successful plans, but you don't get a share of them, don't hesitate to take the initiative to claim them. Don't imply to those deceitful people, "Why don't I have any credit?" You should say, "This is my credit, but it has been ignored. This is so unfair. You and I both know this. We need to talk about how to get to the bottom of this."

Forgetful type:

This type of person will lavish praise on a partner's performance at a planning meeting, but if the plan fails miserably, they will deny ever having supported it.

Solution:

Immediately following the planning meeting, send this forgetful person a short memo-sometimes called a "drag them down" memo-in which you must write a thank you for their support, specifically including something like: "I was truly encouraged when you said my proposed strategy was a wise new direction for our company." If this forgetful person doesn't respond, it's considered an admission. Dr. Virginia E. Bowan, a professor of management at Gettysburg College, explains: "Because this forgetful person's support for the case is already written down, six months later, they are unlikely to go back to senior management and relay their previous disapproval."

Hypocrite type:

This type of despicable person often promises their colleagues that they will absolutely support their promotion, but then mysteriously turns their back on their word. Because such a person doesn't want to fulfill their promises, this hypocrite will secretly spread rumors detrimental to their colleague; or feign concern, suggesting that the colleague needs more experience before being promoted; be careful, these words aren't true. In reality, this hypocrite often relies heavily on the colleague's hard work, but when the colleague asks why they haven't been promoted, the hypocrite denies knowing the reason.

Solution:

When opportunities for career advancement arise, never be satisfied with vague answers. If you don't receive the expected promotion, quietly inquire with partners who know the inside story, speak with the person making the decision, and casually mention that the seemingly kind but actually charismatic person had promised him a favorable recommendation. Even ask this hypocrite for a copy of the recommendation letter he wrote. In particular, you should be more creative in how you investigate such matters. For example, you can explain why you keep that recommendation letter, or say that it can motivate you to challenge difficulties when you are doubting yourself.

The type that chews the tongue root:

This type of person is unlikely to say, "Tell me all the intimate details of your affair with your secretary friend last night," or "By the way, could you explain your strategies for taking over the purchasing department?" Instead, they will use one or two harmless anecdotes about themselves to coax their victims into confiding in them. Dr. Peter Wiley, a psychologist practicing in Washington, D.C., explains: Once he discovers your flaws, he will seize upon them, and if this passion benefits him, he will not hesitate to reveal all your secrets.

Solution:

The best approach is to keep your mouth shut in the presence of this person. Once you understand the root of the problem, all gossips in the world will naturally stop. "If someone always walks into your office, talking incessantly about other people's gossip, you can be fairly certain: this person cannot be trusted," says Dr. Marty Joseph. "When meeting someone for the first time, it's difficult to discern whether they are the type to 'break the unspoken understanding.'" To ensure that a new acquaintance, someone you don't know much about, won't leak secrets, strive to reach a point of reassurance. That is, if you reveal something, immediately determine whether you've gained something of equal value from this person. For example, if we reveal the secret: "I'm preparing to attack the Eastern Alliance's sphere of influence," it's worth about four points. If the other party has also revealed their own secret, worth about four points, such as: "I'm seeing and sleeping with my boss's girlfriend," then you can rest assured, because it's even, and you will be perfectly safe.

The type that spreads rumors and stirs up trouble:

Unlike gossipy people who speak with factual basis, rumor-mongers often fabricate facts out of thin air. They typically use questions to subtly attack others, such as, "I heard a rumor that Jim from the IT department is at a drug rehabilitation center, not vacationing in England, Canada. Is that true?" People often only hear the first part of this question-based statement and don't pay attention to the "Is it true?" part. Once the boss discovers that he's heard rumors about Jim Coke from three or four independent sources, he's very likely to develop a bad impression of poor old Jim.

Solution:

If you don't want a troublemaker to start spreading rumors about you, you need to be quite alert. Usually, this person will start with a milder rumor. For example, they might spread a rumor that you can't finish a task on time. So, if a colleague says to you, "Hey! I heard you're having trouble meeting deadlines, is that true?" you should be wary and investigate the source of the rumor.

Once you find the source of the rumor, you should confront the person spreading it directly and tell them clearly, "I know what you said, and this should stop! If you have a problem with me, you should talk to me directly." By addressing the issue with this "courageous" attitude, you let the person know you understand their intentions, which will be very effective because most cunning people are good at finding excuses to escape. However, you should never assume that the battle with such a person is over. As Dr. Joseph Gosling points out, "You cannot reach an agreement with a dishonest person because all agreements are like castles in the sand, vanishing in an instant."

If simply confronting the issue doesn't work, then a direct confrontation is necessary. According to Jack Levin, a sociology professor at Northeastern University, this is the time to find someone you know well within the company and spread word of rebuttal. If all else fails, there's another age-old fallback. Dick Menrow, chairman of the management committee of the Times and Huagang Group, suggests, "If you're truly bothered by a guy's appalling behavior and you're at your wit's end, perhaps the best thing to do is to give him a good beating." However, he adds, "But I also doubt the effectiveness of this approach." Indeed, isn't it worth the risk to let these despicable people get what they deserve?